I didn’t believe
I would do anything that I’ve done today
I never saw, or even dreamed
that I’d be where I stand today
just a few years ago I couldn’t come out the house
in fear and angst at the outside world
just a few years ago I didn’t volunteer
and while confident in my abilities to be a published author
I never thought I’d have even a part time job
especially not in customer service
just a few years ago my whole life was porn and Madden
now I’m repaying the anger with hum of fingers on these keys
call me Darren McFadden
the anger I used to take out on my family
on strangers
on me
frustrated at the disability that I could never see
the desire but lack of strength to set this soul free
if only I could see the door trust me I’d make the key
now today I know I’m stronger than they said I’d ever be
when I put down the Clorox
and opened up my soul
to some guy living in the sky
I realized he could make me whole
He showed me that my condition
was a gift
put down the knife, put down the concrete
and mend this rift inside me
aspergers humbles me every single day
it reminds me that without him nothing will go my way
when I’m feeling down I put pen to paper and I pray
somebody please take this anxiety away
away
goes the pain
goes the regrets
go the doubters
and to everyone who saw me write nonstop
and said I was wasting my hours
this one’s for you
for the lovers
for the haters
for those who don’t know me
and those who wish they did
