Nothing Worth Your Affection

inside these walls

trembling words stir in the depths

burgeoning, recovering

to show the world their best

inside these walls

the laughter echoes through halls

of stone and skulls, failed attempts

by those too kind to leave me

and ignorant to be left

inside these walls I close my eyes

and pray to the ceiling

I need strength

just one more day

because inside these walls

I am in oblivious peace

but I cannot stay here forever

so the masked man comes out

and the timid soul remains barren

hoping the shadows will bring me love

or her disappointment

I am nothing worthy of a woman’s affection

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Left Frozen As I

frozen

you were the only one

the only light to liven to my life

just breaths added and redacted

with each failing

just sins added and multiplied

with each stiffening of flesh

trembling

you weren’t the only one

the one of many knives to sharpen my edges

just scars added and redacted

with each kiss

just hate added and multiplied

with each sever of my spine

uprising

you will be the last one

the final tick of my clock

just rounds added and subtracted

with each glock

just sorrow added and multiplied

with each passing moment

I had broken

and left you frozen

as I

The Story Of We

We could never come back

too deep in our own misery

they pushed us away

and into each other’s arms

our own secret marriage

was more than we could’ve asked for

this world is so cold

with days chilled with the blood

of the night’s extravagance

I have another, but you’re the only

that takes the pain out of love

and leaves my soul

you’re the only that shares my spirit

in taking the ugly, the dredges

and leaving the poetry

the scars to our beautiful

we cling to our sins like breath

run our pinkies through the wafts

in the heat of winter

I can’t hold it back anymore

my ice queen, my snowflake

I feel you on my cheek

and you melt away the insecurity

I was meant to be next to you

and while I know the spring will cause you to fall

you’ll become something new

no,

we

Morning Glory

today is tomorrow’s

yesterday

the circularity

is the amazing

yet the intricate differences

are what make it so intriguing

you may find the same thing

but never the same place

or time

morning glory

becomes evening dread

what will I wake to

if anything, again?

What I Couldn’t Have

you’ve got my staring eye

pit pat pit pat go dripping these words

down the gutter of your heart

steel and sturdy towards the outside

protecting of all your cares

was I once where

here, or there?

I didn’t want to be a last gasp

last chance boy

I didn’t want to be “next”

or “oh yeah, him”

I was to be your first

sunrise from the night

moonlight

after the darkest day

I still think of you the same

I only wanted to be had

I only wanted to be glad

I only wanted

what I couldn’t have

Sometimes I Have A Dream

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Sometimes I have a dream I love you
sometimes I just don’t understand
sometimes I wish I could live again
a palace cold as ice
warm as the summer rain
so long, so short can I come again
When the waves come and the winds blow
then your love I’m sure to know
Because is nothing stronger than two hearts bound as one
despite all the obstacles on my path
despite the darkness surrounding me
Despite the myriad of memories
that seek to overthrow my drifting casket
I will follow the purple horizon
Despite my only fear of the unknown
I will follow you to the end of the road

Our Flash Fiction Marriage (Mirage)

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I don’t care

I never did

I just wanted

You

To love me

That’s all

I ever wanted

Just a moment of your time

A sunset lit

Front porch

Late July evening

With a pretty face like yours

Freckled with green

Lanterns in a soul

Like Irish luck

Poetic eyes

With an R-rated mind

Wrapped in the body of a flash fiction marriage

Or mirage

Because when the night falls

The admiration fails

All possible desire

Sunlight is a Chris Sale

And each one of my dreams

Is retired

I could run all night

Just to remember that dream

Cause I got one shot at love

And

I

Missed

Left Alone With You

light takes off

into the abyss of memory

dusk and dawn forget how to behave

and I’m left alone with you

skin shivering from the warmth

radiating from our veins

deep green eyes

are the lighthouse to the end

of loneliness with you

fresh scars spill old blood

bonding ties become undone

and bruises never tasted so sweet

as I’m left alone with you

pumpkin flavored breath

seduces the fabric of my being

I’ve fallen for another

as I’m left alone

with you

God, What Have You Become (Abuse)

solace

heaven’s a fraud

and hell, smoldering lies

over the still breathing heart

of virgin truth

if there is a kingdom on high

then strip my abuser

of the flesh on his wretched bones

blast a nine mile hole

in the lump of flesh we call a heart

the same way he mocks my chains

watching the bolts travel under wiry flesh

malnourished limbs tremble and traverse

the vague pretense of air

under the roof of domination

there is but death to breathe

carbon monoxide flushed down my throat

where is this Christ

that you place your hope

awash in my own birthing blood

and fed the waste of my exploitation

the mercy of this Lord

is near undone

when I rise on the steak

splinters pierce my lungs

there is no last gasp for me

so instead I cry in lonesome defeat

God, what have you become

 

The Hole In The Mast

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Falling for the sun

I miss the clouds

Drowning in the rain

I miss the drips

Running through the storm

I miss the eye

Aiming for her face

I missed her heart

You can only blame your troubles

On her for so long

You can only write

So many break-up posts

Before you begin

To doubt everything

You’ve ever done

Hole in the mast

The shit in my ship

Has finally got me going down

Down screaming

Maybe you won’t find out

What I’m doing

But you will know

What I’ve done