Man In The Mirror

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I knew my past

Would haunt me in the future

When I took a long look in the mirror

I saw someone neither dead nor alive

Simply hovering, at best, over a plane not yet understood

Both the angels and demons tugged at his soul for ownership

But he budged not

Quietly contemplating the oddities of his existence

And the realm of stupidity in the insistence

To choose the middle ground, and not one side

Or the other

For in offering up his self, he would gain the next world

And in offering up the next world, he would forever claim the present

For the wise, there is no such thing as an easy decision

But for me, I made it long ago

I don’t have faith in the present or future

I don’t have faith in people or gods

I only know that the sun will come up

And the moon will go down

I only know that people will love and fuck

And hate and murder and consecrate images

Of men they neither love nor respect

Yet perpetually emulate

I only know that the Earth will exist but for so long

Until our damage cannot be ignored any more

I only know about tomorrow

And that’s why I chose to stay

Today

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Split

WAMTAC
Hiding from myself
The memories boxed up and shipped far
Into the recesses of time
But when it’s cold, the shingles stir
Dark clouds gather on the horizon
Lightning shatters confidence and sways
Funnel clouds evaporate conscious efforts
I crack and crumble and admit my faults
I fucked up so many times, why am I here
I say all the wrong things, think thoughts
Of a murderer, of a slave, of a con
I do all the wrong things, push everyone away
Friends and family say things, and deep down
I know they’re right, but my ego gets hard
And I fight the truth I know inside
It’s so cold when the winds leave
And so alone without the thunder distracting
I can hear all my demons vying for my head
Splitting my heaven into hell

I Should Be Dead, Shouldn’t I?

 

THE-BOLD-MOM_Tina_Reaper

I can’t go any longer

raw from the memories

I force myself to replay

the blood on the sheets

I tried to make myself believe

they weren’t real

no, not digging inside me

maggots from hell stirring inside my brain

scars lasted with the pain

but the essence follows me

into the present day

the scorn, the punishments

they weren’t real

no, not my stomach bleeding out

lies to professionals casts miserable doubt

it was my heart I thought I cared about

but my soul was left crushed

and then everyone found out

the desire, the sin

she’s not real

no, not the way she gives me her everything

and places firm kisses on my lips

asking me never to leave

willingly I submit to her release

because with her I’m free

I believe

I couldn’t any longer

I believed

I wasn’t worthy of love

I dream

of burning in hell for my sins

and maybe I will

maybe I won’t

only now does the journey

truly begin

Darkness Abides In All

WAMTAC

In the midst of an internal storm….

the untold stories
of darkness prevail
over widening seas
and Hell’s Deep can hardly contain
the fire of night
waking us up
and bringing us down
we may never know the wholeness of breath
or solitude of sound
for the darkness abides in all
will you let her come around
stoke up the magic within
and burn in and of her glory
let the Phoenix be called to arms
spit lava and pumice upon the world
for poets are the volcanoes
of humanity
and within the darkness we spew
life is born through trials
see the words rise
on the wings of the wind

Death Is My Friend, Don’t Make Me Call In A Favor

wamtac

Death is my friend

don’t make me call in a favor

I know how to cover the tracks, and come back for more later

See the wind blow?

Got my name on it

Ever find me?

Don’t bet on it

I make people scream

run out your home, little girl

Lie awake in deathly fever dream

blood and bile they hurl

I wake up

when you kiss her goodnight

and I don’t go slow

Make sure she holds on tight

Pour out your oil

and mumble your words

I’ll make you quick work

before anyone ever heard

Don’t wake up

for I’ll be home soon

and watch the blood

cover the moon