I Should Be Dead, Shouldn’t I?



I can’t go any longer

raw from the memories

I force myself to replay

the blood on the sheets

I tried to make myself believe

they weren’t real

no, not digging inside me

maggots from hell stirring inside my brain

scars lasted with the pain

but the essence follows me

into the present day

the scorn, the punishments

they weren’t real

no, not my stomach bleeding out

lies to professionals casts miserable doubt

it was my heart I thought I cared about

but my soul was left crushed

and then everyone found out

the desire, the sin

she’s not real

no, not the way she gives me her everything

and places firm kisses on my lips

asking me never to leave

willingly I submit to her release

because with her I’m free

I believe

I couldn’t any longer

I believed

I wasn’t worthy of love

I dream

of burning in hell for my sins

and maybe I will

maybe I won’t

only now does the journey

truly begin


Darkness Abides In All


In the midst of an internal storm….

the untold stories
of darkness prevail
over widening seas
and Hell’s Deep can hardly contain
the fire of night
waking us up
and bringing us down
we may never know the wholeness of breath
or solitude of sound
for the darkness abides in all
will you let her come around
stoke up the magic within
and burn in and of her glory
let the Phoenix be called to arms
spit lava and pumice upon the world
for poets are the volcanoes
of humanity
and within the darkness we spew
life is born through trials
see the words rise
on the wings of the wind

Death Is My Friend, Don’t Make Me Call In A Favor


Death is my friend

don’t make me call in a favor

I know how to cover the tracks, and come back for more later

See the wind blow?

Got my name on it

Ever find me?

Don’t bet on it

I make people scream

run out your home, little girl

Lie awake in deathly fever dream

blood and bile they hurl

I wake up

when you kiss her goodnight

and I don’t go slow

Make sure she holds on tight

Pour out your oil

and mumble your words

I’ll make you quick work

before anyone ever heard

Don’t wake up

for I’ll be home soon

and watch the blood

cover the moon