Reluctance

Specks of dust

Cloud the perimeter

Sweeping the chaos to a corner

The negligent, the sinister

Standing behind my own bars

Like a hardened criminal

I try to stay positive

but the blood stays cynical

Symbiotic with my need to destroy

Is the molting of a teenage boy

Into half man, half beast

Trudging on for a feast not of food

Or hard drink

But love

The kind that makes you think

Why we ever stopped caring for each other

And when

Did social media ever become socially accepted

When did pressing a button

Ever mean the same as a literal kiss

I would be remiss if I said this was good

And though I have seemed to miss

The want from a girl

I am still a patient observer, my time will come

The best chase is that of a mind chastened

My demons run, angels flee to protect

And in time the negatives will be undone

Lofty are my dreams

Descending from a rejected heart

Because I know there is more to give

Than a half-reluctant spark

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The Inside Tells A Different Story

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Machine
The dream
Bursting oil drums at the metal seams
Cascade
Deranged
Busting bodies on every foreign plane
Watching the blood drip from their eyelids
Seeing the burkas shred with the blast
The children can’t fight back, they run that
Underground bunker killing our insurgents
Ding ding, the bullets ricochet off metal plates
Boom boom, RPG’s detonate and leave hands
Armless
On the sides of roads
Men come back home
And they find no home
Wives gone crazed, children criss crossed by long days
The schools have made a nation weak
We want freedom but don’t know the price it takes
The lights go down but they keep fighting
For great flag, Liberty keeps on shining
Despite our abortions, despite our police
Despite the GMO’s and lies that we believe
I’mthankful for my god who oversees this land
Thankful for stronger men than I
Who battle in the enemy’s camp

Shades Of Gray

They don’t reflect me

Not the buildings, not the glass, not the pages

Not the law, not the movement, not the puzzle

piece that they think I am

Not simply a pawn in April’s misinformation

Not a rat in the race to fix broken relations

The glue in the shoes of those who care most

Aren’t asking for money or shares, no boasts

Of how much they care, the proof says no

I am not a statistic, nor a ratio, nor an anomaly

Everything I’ve done has been seen

The only difference is the soul it’s created by

And that special power cannot be bought

cloned, or appropriated, simply mystifying

Ima scared, reckless, tormented Cancer

And my life and words be damned if I died

Saying the world figured me, and I them

I still don’t know why I press send

I still don’t know why I won’t kiss her

I still don’t know why I did

My days are never sunny, never cloudy

But a perfect shade of grey

Just enough devil to make you afraid

Just enough angel to light your way

Scars From History We Don’t Teach

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Razors are annoying
Cutting too much
Too little
Scarring the face, lost in the race
To achieve something
Four ugly scars on one side
Two on the other
It’s quite shameful
What could they say? Nothing?
Or everything?
The in between is the disaster
Politics are annoying
Cutting out too much of the poor
Cutting in too many rich
Scarring the face of the nation
Lost in the race for supremacy
We’ve become supremely decadent
Scars for the aborted, scars for the forgotten
Scars from the history we don’t teach

Song of the Year

The song of the year

Would be tears

Would be what could’ve been

And wasn’t done

The record of the year

Was that we care

Was that we’re equal

Even though some want walls

The artist of the year

Was everyone

Played for fools

Paying premium prices

For what the previous seller sold at half price

You know who I mean

He inspired many

A people

Now that’s gone

And the season of senseless silencing of black lives

Rolls on

Neither Writing Nor Rioting

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Stop
I’m talking to you
Yes, the one who hasn’t said a word
Who hasn’t raised his hand
Hardly given the teacher a glance
No, he’s not here. Not ever.
He’s writing to a girl he hopes to meet
From Ohio. Wisconsin. Or Massachusetts.
Dreaming of a wonderful life together.
Frolicking in the snow, and the passion
Between keeps them warm
He’s rioting on the steps of City Hall
Tears in his eyes he asks for justice
True justice, a calling not for more action
But in silence
Hear the angels in still whispers
And in heaven’s lights take back the night
He wants to see his people free
He’s neither writing nor rioting
Sitting nor standing
Just being himself
Just being
A little loud at times
Too shy for others
But the goal is real
And the passion unlike another

I Don’t Like Listening

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I don’t like listening
At least not to you
The same ‘ok news, the same ‘ol
Breaking, boring news
It’s excruciating to bear
Pretending I care about celebrities
I couldn’t care less, whether they gained
Or lost
But their lives are pushed on me as real
Images barraged upon souls as if they were gods
They are mortals, no greater or less than I
So why aren’t people mimicking my wardrobe
Or getting tattoos of my name?
I haven’t sold out yet? No mixtape?
No record breaking single about gold chains?
No leaked sex tapes? No album cover
Adorned with spread legs and whiskey bottles?
I don’t have a crew of white fuckboys
Posting daily cringe videos on YouTube
There’s a lot of things I’m not
And a conformist is one of them
Standing on the outside of your inside
Is a life goal of mine
And might be the only thing I’ve ever done
That I was proud of

Nothing Left To Say

Violators will be prosecuted

Unless you’re rich and white

We’ll make light of your pitfalls

Hell, you might become president

Trespassing is for the victorious

But who wants to break the status quo

Certainly not Americans today

Certainly not humans today

Don’t tread on my heels, or stub my toe

I’m comfortable knowing nothing

And dying on my own

Work menial jobs and get paid minimum wage

It only exists cause there’s minimum rage

Bacon in these bills that nobody questions

Left, right, they’re not the ones to fault

It’s you

Tweeting and posting while blood spills away

Drinking and eating tomorrow away

Highway to hell but we’re okay with it

As long as we can get a selfie along the way

You’re breaking not just my heart, America

But my soul

And I have nothing left to say

Taken From Home

Pain of travel

No one cares

About the breathing

Time whips the human soul

Out of its body

Broken bones aren’t as weak

As the shattered mind

Individual

Rendered

Inept

Aboard the oceans

Across the ships

Never to return home

Never to return

Peace and prosperity

White sands become the enemy

Yet white men

Become angels

To run was death

To live was death

Are we really free

When the sun bakes our voices

Are they really angels

Waving swords around our hearts

Mighty beats of our

Native drum

Beat so far

Beat so long

Beating forever

One day we’ll come home

Riveting

Wondering

Sands and blood

Nations undone

Hunt Me Down

Hunt me down

Till I hit the ground

I can hear the sound

Chains wrapped around

My wrists, ankles, thighs

Put a board around my neck

Admonish me for rest

And proclaim my endurance to be the best

Because of my muscles

And my back

But I am just as you

With the care and compassion that you lack

It is because I’m black

That you haunt my days

That you slash my face

And take my family away

My women subjected to rape

And children they never did take

To create a new life

Only tie them up and push them down

Into the river, hear the sounds

Of their tears, of their fears

Awash in the blood of the master

Who knows no fear

And you say God favors your skin

Killing us is his very whim

Black is your white stag

Today I’m forced to take up a sport

Because otherwise I’m queer

And those that are, they’re shoved afar

Because they’re all afraid to hear

What a young black woman

Or a young black man

Will say when you remove their fear

And let them see the strength they have inside

The whites die

The power structure cries

And their chains are lifted into the sky

Because I am your white stag

But I know the oceans that were crossed

And in the plantations we suffered loss

But today is a day to remember who we are

And forever will be