It Was Always Me

It wasn’t you

it was always me, me and my

insecurity

forever able to protect my heart with a click and a prayer

but unable to be alone with the only one I’ve ever known

inability

forever able to convey my emotions with words

yet silent when we’re face to face

you asked me why, you asked me how

you begged me, what’s so different now

I scream out loud as I ride the bow

the icy waters crashing all around

I turn to her, loving every fading moment

regretting every time I said I had something better

she was my something

something better than my quiet ever provided

my silent time ended with each demand

but the moments with her opened promises

of a brighter tomorrow

but I’ve crafted this plank

and now I walk it

no turning back

not now