Autism Awareness Month Post Nineteen: Hey God, I Don’t Think I Thank You Enough

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(Actually, I know I don’t.)

When I was diagnosed with Aspergersย four years ago, I honestly thought he was cursing me. Some punishment, I thought. (Probably for all the videos I used to watch, but that’s another story) Still, I had to live, even if I didn’t know why this burden was placed in my life. I hated my life. I hated everything about myself. Fast forward to today, and things are quiet different. My confidence (while not high) is growing a little every day, and I’ve accomplished a lot. (Published in Teen Ink’s October Edition of 2015…three award winning articles on Teen Ink’s website…staying published on SpillWords…joining an Art Council…getting a job at one of my favorite shops in Maryland…and voice behind a blog that’s followed by thousands) Despite my weaknesses and short-comings, I always seem to come out on top (or pretty close to it), and I owe it to nothing and no oneย but the divine. I had a rough childhood, and I did a lot of bad things as a kid, but to where I am today. To see how much you all love my words, and how much of an impact I’ve had on you…that tells me, and should tell you, that there’s someone watching us. Guiding us towards something greater than we could ever imagine. It’s truly relieving to know there’s someone watching your back….(and pulling you back when you’re about to walk into a trap)

 

Hey God,

I don’t think

I thank you enough

In fact, I know I don’t

every time the heart beats

and these lungs take in air

is an unbreakable seal

and confirmation that you are there

there isn’t a sunset

or season change

that you haven’t arranged

not a day or night

that you haven’t created

with your own might

I have a lot of weaknesses

food and sexy girls just two

but in spite of them I live

and I owe it all to you

and I have a lot of sadness

from being friendless

to struggling with Aspergers

but with your strength

I continue to live this

life you’ve given me

and every word that I write

causes me to see

that I am loved

beyond my downfalls and impurities

that I am loved

above all the evil inside of me

there’s not enough time

no matter of hours or days

could contain

the amount of praise

you deserve

but with my words

let your love be heard by all

and through me

may your grace save us

from the fall

 

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26 Replies to “Autism Awareness Month Post Nineteen: Hey God, I Don’t Think I Thank You Enough”

  1. I love this, there’s a real optimism there. As for the dating thing you mentioned in the other blog, just put it down to experience and don’t give up. I’d imagine the traffic on those websites fluctuates. Might as well keep your details up there just in case? Someone might surprise you one day.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Love this. ๐Ÿ˜€ I can certainly relate. I know I fall down in the thankfulness to God department daily. For all the challenges, I truly believe He has a purpose in creating us as He has. We have unique insights into this world to share. Thank you. I needed this boost. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

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