Fifty Shades Darker Than Dakota’s Dreams


Through the shades

of my words

you see the pain

You feel hurt, you feel soaked

in the wake of fear and shame

An acidic rain

of biblical proportions

when I cannot live as you expect me to

so I go through the motions

just to impress you

but I hurt me

every time I put on the smile

I choke this soul

with every extra mile

walked to satisfy your needs

and from the struggle I bleed

and apparent weakness you see

but it’s not because of me

and it never was

I used to want you to accept me

and so I did anything

that would seem to dignify my presence

but after being let down

and diminishing my value

I’ve learned my lesson

Nobody cares about us

until we do something great

but by then, we’re probably dead

the feeling of being alone

isolated from fellow human beings

To depression, and far worse,

we’re led

and no matter what we say

or what we do

we’ll never matter

never matter to you

Shake me down

search my soul

but I’m carrying nothing

but a bad attitude

and hate crimes towards the belligerent

and inconsiderate towards autistics

15 thoughts on “Fifty Shades Darker Than Dakota’s Dreams

  1. I have Bipolar symptoms and can totally relate to this poem. I feel like I have to put on a medicated smile to fit into this world. Like people do understand the pain that I go through on a daily basis and one of these days I feel like I will do some great in my life but no one will notice until after I die. I feel like I can relate to the feelings of isolation and fear. What a great poem, Thanks for sharing. I really like your work.


      1. There’s not much choice. You have to live in a world that doesn’t understand people with disabilities. Props to you for putting it out there in writing and creative expression. Well done. And thanks for following me.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Well, somebody has to tell them. There seems to be this stereotype that people with disabilities won’t talk about their disability…I have to try and break that.
          No problem. Can’t wait to read more of your posts 🙂

          Liked by 1 person

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