Swelter And Swallow

wamtac

hit down the line
blood drips to half time
swelter and swallow, is it mine
(yes, now heed this rhyme)

every single time you trip and fall
the demon’s of your past got you and all
of your fears and admonitions come true
thrust and ejaculate on you they do

cause they smell the fear of a child’s mind
and I’m not talking bout you, but me
yes this is mine, this psycho mind
trips and stumbles over fake lines

cause I’ve got a human mind, just like you
and I try to believe what I’m listening to
but sometimes it’s all fucking fake
fastball, fastball, sinker, oh you took the bait

on the spectrum, so I’m cautious of everyone
cause I can’t trust any human under the sun
except for her, and look what happened
the damage is cruel, the deed is done

so back to the blood I was speaking of
I feel me drowning, look at it run
around my face, down my thighs
trembles of death tick down with time

approaching the grave, my life a fail
cause there wasn’t a soul I didn’t save
not even my own, I am a mess
life’s just a pay stub of death

Please Save Me (My Petition)

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there and back again
dark lord, specimen of sin
silence of peace, he’s come to rend
mechanical grin

wielding a silent force, he silences the voice
strangling the victim, who has no choice
but to give his life and rights
weeping in slavery, there is no price

just lifelong servitude
to a silent stalker who has no use
swallowing the sperm of his dominion
bowing profusely to the abuse

if silence comes in waves
then I’ve surely drowned
under the weight of births
I am giving my body, but I make no sound

unless I wish to burned
by the fire of one I universally serve
without joy, without condition
except it is the condition

please save me
my petition

Midnight Highs In An Unknown Alley

WAMTAC

sitting in the middle of an alley
I’m below whatever’s in the valley
heart sliding, soul slipping down a slope
it’s hard to breathe when failures have you
pants down, neck choked
just got paid but my soul is broke
nobody hears these cries
nope
another verse, another song
the road just keeps winding
poorly remembered faces
cloud my memory like a devilish throng
tossing my spirit like a romaine lettuce
Boy, they’ve got the wrong tongs
and they’re dressing me wrong
booby traps line the path into the night long
mine is Kelsi Monroe
I know it’s wrong but I can’t say no
I trust myself for a night
as far as I can throw
when the world is calling blitz
roving defenders in the box
I melt faster than snow
resting on a Tucson home
my hands roam
wherever you let them
be it good, be it sin
I can’t say no, I let you in
do what you please, don’t mind me
and as I’m dying today
I think I finally see
I’ve made a mess of me
about to die a death eternally
I think I’m not free
I am free
I think I’m free
I’m not free
the waters I’ve always hated
the eternal sea
are the only thing
that can save me

 

 

 

 

Tried And True (never applied to you)

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methods tried and true
have never applied to you
walking around like
you’re one of them
but you knew that I can’t
follow through
the lies creep through terminally
like a cancer they subjugate
subliminally they deceive
convince you of the king
you were never meant to be
promise riches, money, and fame
girls, boys, girls, whatever you enjoy
just for a piece of your name
people seem kind on the outside
but inside they’re coy
and shiftless
hoping to overwhelm with thanks
supposed acts of kindness
part of polite society
just to catch you witless
in face of the pressure
I’ve taken their measurements
and watched the concoction
blow up in their face
because no matter where I work
or where I live
I have no place
you can’t confine me off race
or the lines of misery on my face
on and on
they try to box us in
say they’re aware
while they grin
at the kid who won’t listen
to the shit
that he’ll never amount to anything
he’s got his wit, he just doesn’t know it
teach these kids to embrace it
own it
I can’t make it go away
the pain endures
until we stop breathing
but stop heaving
you courageous archer
not of this earth
whatever they call it
when you enter into life
from birth remember
this is not a curse
no disgrace
but to ignore it is a waste
you only get one chance
so take what’s yours
step up to your place
I’m watching you
I love you
and I’ll be here
till we get it right

 

Wholeheartedly Heart Broken

wamtac

light abandons
hope endlessly wavers
a sea of hands
envelopes twisting veins
arteries transport revenge
and regret
mystifies the soul
traveling into a shallow pool
serpents and servants
free to please
latch on like a leach
transmit disease
dissapear like black cats
on Halloween
and how did Eve
listen to the winds
crying descent
I am wholeheartedly
broken hearted
not only bent
and broken
never to love
with her rejection
continuously spoken

Secrets Defiled The Womb

 

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stumble
and cracking
she bled onto the pavement
children within
too much to bare
any longer
much fonder of isolation
her secrets defiled the womb
of her individuality
the one she looked to for protection
twisted the hands
bent the feet
and broke the time
left to wander for eternity
growing belly a mark for all
to see
repulsed by her nudity
and offended by her fate
the world shades it’s eyes
from the difficult
the sex slaves go unnoticed
and she too was abandoned
crying out one last time
she offered the air the sacrifice
of her body
she offered the ground her life
free from the bond of gravity
her tears flowed effortlessly
and for once her heart was satifised
to bow one final time
and exit
the scene

Silence Heals My Insane

wamtac

There’s a silence

That heals the insane

The wild, racing part of me

Never kept in check

By a voracious heartbeat

Dying to love you more

But hiding it all in life

Manic meltdowns

Leading to tear soaked pages

And curses uttered

From bottomless agony

Never meant to harm

But to release me

From the grapple of

The darkness

I still somehow

Can’t escape

 

The Arrogance I Shine

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bent and broken

my face the token

of your socialite policy

fears and flames awoken

by the silent shaming

of ears pricked up

hairs peeled back

when I make a statement

misinterpret a joke

the costume falls flat

and now I’m forced to reconcile

into the life and love I never had

it was plain to see

but it took them to crucify my heart

betrayed by a suicidal mind

to see the reality

I had ignored for so much time

they don’t care for me

they’re not the friends for me

don’t understand me

can’t reprimand me

because I do the same thing

everyday

because I don’t care about a thing

everyday

while you sit around waiting for me to change

oh hey

I’m insane

the arrogance I shine

tans you like an ultraviolet ray

I don’t think about what I say

because I really was born this way

I take no for an answer

because I’ll say yes to myself

I dish it because I can take it

look at the hand the devil’s dealt

feel the welts

no, they’re on the inside

feel the shockwaves

they flow every time

you start speaking

I start leaking

every ounce of content

until I’m bursting with anger

and all darkness

ceases with one final dagger

to the soul

now silent again

 

Child Born Of Tremor and Turmoil

 

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writing is my love

my life

the beginning and end

of an always speaking wife

we noticed one another

while drifting away from life

on the verge of exiting

she stole the knife

we courted on balconies

piers

and windows crept through

by cellphone light

we wed four years ago

happy as could be

believing us

is all we would ever need

marriage is not

without difficulty

for to unify two individuals

someone must be subverted

to keep the peace of another

so I remained silent

pregnant by another

far more ravenous insatiable lover

and when the night falls

I run to her

begging to be spared

and spare the world

of a child born of tremor

and turmoil

agony agony I cry

why do you leave me alone

to perish

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